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Science is Hard – For Congressman Hank Johnson, At Least.

April 1, 2010

Geology is particularly perplexing, it seems. You see, according to Rep. Hank Johnson (D – GA), if there are too many military personnel stationed on Guam, the island might totally tip over.

For reals! As Frank J. Fleming said on Twitter:

“If we put Marines on Guam, it could tip over. BTW, I’m now making your medical decisions.”

Think that’s hyperbole? Guess again! From The Hill (emphasis mine):

Rep. Hank Johnson (D-Ga.) is afraid that the U.S. Territory of Guam is going to “tip over and capsize” due to overpopulation.

Johnson expressed his worries during a House Armed Services Committee hearing on the defense budget Thursday.

Addressing Adm. Robert Willard, who commands the Navy’s Pacific Fleet, Johnson made a tippy motion with his hands and said sternly, “My fear is that the whole island will become so overly populated that it will tip over and capsize.”

Willard paused and said: “We don’t anticipate that.”

How Willard contained himself, I’ll never know.

Watch and enjoy. Or weep at the state of our alleged leaders. Or both.

Islands can become top heavy, you know! They just sort of float on the top of the water. It’s a very precarious situation!

What other cuckoo pants idea is next, Democrats? That humans are warming the Earth? Oh.

Of course, it is WE who don’t understand. Ace of Spades has the scoop; according to Johnson, we just didn’t get his nuanced concerns. Being wing nutty rubes and all:

So speaketh Rep. Johnson (D-I’mSuperSerial!):

“I wasn’t suggesting that the island of Guam would literally tip over I was using a metaphor to say that with the addition of 8,000 Marines and their dependents – an additional 80,000 people during peak construction on the tiny island with a population of 180,000 – could be a tipping point which could adversely affect the island’s fragile ecosystem and could overburden its stressed infrastructure. Having traveled to Guam last year, I saw firsthand how this beautiful – but vulnerable island – could easily become overburdened, and I was simply voicing my concerns that the addition of that many people could tip the delicate balance and do permanent harm to Guam.”

Ahh…he was using a metaphor, you see. He was speaking so gosh-darn figuratively that y’all just couldn’t comprehend it.

I feel like pulling the old reversal on him and asking him why he wants the people of Guam to die. Island Capsization Denier!

P.S. Yes, I know he has Hepatitis -C. That doesn’t cause stupidity, to my knowledge. But, as we can see, Science is hard.

In the meantime, you can learn more about and contribute to Liz Carter, the woman running against Johnson in District 4, HERE.


(cross-posted at RedState and at iowntheworld)

5 Comments leave one →
  1. April 1, 2010 5:42 pm

    If that was”dry humor”this poor guy must be dehydrated.

  2. April 3, 2010 11:59 pm

    I capsized an island once. Those Bahama Mamas can really get ya!

  3. Angry Pancreas permalink
    April 4, 2010 3:08 pm

    “So speaketh Rep. Johnson (D-I’mSuperSerial!):”

    *snort*

    I had a wtf and a LMAO moment and then felt bad for his ignorance.
    There. I ran the gamut of emotions. I’m spent.
    [send me some gubmint cheese so that I may be replenished]
    :->

  4. April 6, 2010 12:28 am

    Waiting for his observations on the Mexicali Earthquake. His scientific knowledge will be so….appreciated. Dim Bulb ya got there Georgia.

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  1. Rep. Johnson: Guam “could tip over and capsize” | Hot Daily Gossip

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