Good News! Cleavage for Naughty Man Bits!
Okay, maybe not good news — I’m rather confused by the whole idea and don’t quite know what to think. Or if I want to think about it.
Sheesh, men! Must you try to usurp our super cool cleavage powers too? Oppressors!
LONDON (Reuters) – Hundreds of British men are risking a Valentine’s Day anticlimax for their partners by stocking up on anatomy-boosting underpants ahead of the most romantic weekend of the year.
British department store group Debenhams said Thursday it had seen a 76 percent surge in online sales of the 18 pounds-a-pair ($28) underwear in the past week.
The pants work by using a lift and hold feature at the front, like a male version of the cleavage-boosting Wonderbra.
“The briefs mean that no man ever needs to feel inadequate again on the most passionate day of the social calendar,” said Rob Faucherand, head
of men’s accessories buying at Debenhams.
“However we can’t be held responsible for what happens once the pants come off,” he added.
That’s nuts! When the underpants come off, it gives new meaning to the term “dropped the ball.” I also think we need to change that whole “good things, small packages” phrase. Shall we change it to “good things come in bulge-enhancing packages?”
And various other groan-inducing puns. I have to stop now before I hate myself. Even more.
Too bad the “suspicious package” underwear bomber didn’t have these. At least he then could have had his naughty bits looking somewhat impressive before he, you know, totally blew them off with a bomb.
h/t Domestic Dame
(cross-posted at iowntheworld.com)