Great Scott! Brown Wins!
Yes, I used the Great Scott line again. Sorry, but I like it and I feel all clever and punny when I say it. I watched MSNBC tonight to follow along with the Coakley v. Brown election returns. Firstly, because I’m super nice — the things I do, so that you don’t have to. Secondly, because I knew it would be hilarious. Here’s a quick run-down as events unfolded (It’s like live-blogging, only on a taped delay. Just go with it):
My take so far on the Massachusetts Senate race. The good news: unfounded hubris no longer fools people. The bad news: I’m all about unwarranted arrogance, sigh.
Oh! Olbermann is totally pulling the tired, old You Are All Racists ™ angle and if Brown wins, that’s why. Thus, I am convinced Brown has, in fact, won. And won big.
Olbermann now saying that Brown’s pick-up truck was “code”. Hello? What happened to that whole “Post-Racial” deal? Did that mean “INVENT racism absolutely everywhere”? Also, Dear Olby: I drive a station wagon (shaddup). You know what that is “code” for? It’s code for “Olbermann stinks”.
Personal request: I really hope MSNBC shows when Rachel Maddow takes a weeping Keith Olbermann into her big, strong arms to console him.
It was actually pretty sad watching a pitiful, near tears Chris Matthews just now. Totally kidding. It was HE-LARIOUS.
Awesome. Maddow has Howard Dean on. Oh! Howard Dean just said: “People who blame others are losers.”
Wait… Did he just call Obama a loser? Yeeeaarggh!
Howard Dean also called himself a loser. Because right before he said “People who blame others are losers” — he blamed Bush. (P.S. Totally keep doing that, Democrats. It’s working out great! Thankies!)
SHOCKER: Rachel Maddow just divulged she also drives a truck. Never would have guessed! (Not that there’s anything wrong with that)
9:20 P.M. COAKLEY CONCEDES!
Maddow is totally crying! For reals! I’d feel sorta badly, if she wasn’t such a huge douche and all. Instead, I giggle madly! Okay, that’s a lie. I giggle-snorted. Yes, I actually snorted with mirth.
A Republican Senator. In MASSACHUSETTS. Now THAT is change that I CAN believe in.
Congratulations Senator Scott Brown. Thank you for the hope. The real kind.
Dear Democrats and Obama: VA, NJ and now MASSACHUSETTS. Um, face it. We really just aren’t that into you.
Okay, there is a look into what I do on election nights. Only, you know, sitting on my couch and saying the stuff out loud. I’m very glad my cockiness yesterday was not unfounded. And thank you, Massachusetts, for finally breaking out of your mass hypnosis!
P.S. Dude, everyone on MSNBC looks like John Kerry tonight. You know, because of the super long mope faces and all.
P.P..S. I love you, Senator-Elect Scott Brown. That is all.
P.P.P.S. Scott Brown’s victory speech: Huh. Brown doesn’t seem to be reading directly from a teleprompter. And is speaking really, really well. No “uh uh ums” — Weird!
P.P.P.P.S. “I’m Scott Brown. I’m from Wrentham. And I drive a truck”: — I’m Lori. I’m from Greenville. And I totally heart you.
Another P.S., sigh: I wish MSNBC would extend its coverage tonight and do a live web cam feed of Maddow in her dressing room, scrawling in her “manifesto” and listening to “Everybody Hurts” on a loop.
(cross-posted at iowntheworld.com)