Insulation Can Really Get You HOT!
Standing in a Home Depot in Alexandria, Virginia today, President Obama said that home insulation “is sexy.”
“I know the idea may not be very glamorous, although I getreally excited about it,” Mr. Obama said, “here’s what’s sexyabout it: saving money.”
Huh. I thought there was a bunch of global warming and stuff going on? Why do we need to be worried about cold and heating bills? Isn’t that why AIR was made a “so dangerous it must be regulated” pollutant? Science is hard.
Also super sexy? Caulking!
Uncle Sam wants you…to get out your guns. Your caulk guns. President Obama is going to induce taxpayers to weatherize themselves out of the recession. Big Nanny is now Big Bob the Builder.
Not only does Obama have absolutely no knowledge of the private sector and business, but he also obviously has no knowledge of, you know, anything. Can’t afford your heating bills? Nothing a little hot, pink, insulation won’t fix! This Christmas season is the least Christmas-y that I can remember (I suppose, then, I have to give it a good, solid B+) and I’m frazzled, stressed and worried about paying bills. Turns out, maybe I just need some sexy insulation?
UPDATE: I think I’m going to get a web cam and video myself caulking. Sexy Sells! I’ll be a CaulkBot. It should bring in the big, sexy bucks! (the stimulus is working!)
UPDATE II: Dear Obama: The problem isn’t the $20 bills floating out my uncaulked (so unsexy) windows. It’s the $20 bills floating off to the IRS.
UPDATE III: I was just in my crawl space digging out some Christmas wrap and such. Um…. I got a little “worked up” after seeing the oh os SEXY insulation in there. *fanning self* Now, I need a cigarette! Maybe I can bum one off of Obama?
(cross-posted at iowntheworld.com)